Helena Hagwick is a very old and wise woman. She is the mother of Lorenzo and Loren Zo, the sister of Helga, the ex-sister in law of Fatty MacGee, and the aunt of Johanna MacGee. She is the lunch lady of a normal school by day, and the headmistress of a vampire school by night. She is dating various mad scientists, only so she can get a hold of their chemicals. She likes to create potions to torture people she doesn't like. When she can't torture people with her potions, she tortures them with her cane. Whenever she gets arrested, she just uses a spell to teleport her to another town where they don't know her criminal records.
Helena's spells will always have a single flaw. For example, Helena's flaw for her levitation spell is that the levitated object will turn into a pie. Another example is that when Helena turned Helga's husband fat and lazy, the flaw was that his name turned from "Forest" to "Fatty". Helena is still trying to fix these flaws even at her very old age.